It took two weeks for me to relent. I didn’t intend to be cruel to Greg. I didn’t think in terms like that. I refused to think about Greg at all. He treated me like I was going to be there no matter what he said or did, and I wasn’t.
Had I taken time to think it through, I’d have returned the next day. When I did think about it, I realized I was the only visitor he had who wasn’t required to visit him. I did have feelings for him and as soon as I thought about him, I wanted to see him.
I knew where I stood with Greg. I knew what was going to happen the minute he got out of that bed. I was his best friend, until he was set free, but that was okay. I bought that arrangement, when I realized Greg was alone. This was the only way we were ever going to be together, and I wanted to be with him, no matter how big a dick he was.
Once I did think about him, I was on my way back at six the next evening. I had to stop at the gate to renew my expired pass. They had to call to see if Greg was still strung up on one of their wards. A different MP gave me the same directions.
“Turn right on Perimeter. You drive two miles.”
“I can’t miss it,” I interrupted him.
“It’s on the left. You can’t miss it,” he said, and a smile came to his stern MP face.
“Nice to know they haven’t moved it,” I said, and the smile continued as he looked down into the car at me.
“You’ve done this before?” he asked.
“Yes, my… friend is in the hospital.”
“He army?”
“Army brat.”
“Lot of that going around,” he said. “Enjoy your visit. Carry on, dude.”
He gave me a snappy wave to officially allow me to proceed past his station onto the base. He stepped back and the next car in a growing line pulled up as I moved to Perimeter Road, turning right.
I parked and took the pass into the nurses’ station for signing. As I walked toward the last ward on the left side, I heard this exchange.
“Thank gawd! Maybe that boy will give us some peace for an
hour or two,” one nurse said to another.
“Boy’s a handful all right,” she replied.
As I turned onto the ward, Greg’s eyes were on me. How could he have known I was coming? There was no smile and no acknowledgement. He never took his deep blue eyes off me as I closed in on his bed. I couldn’t read his expression.
“Hi,” I said, refraining from asking him how he was.
He continued to stare at me but he didn’t say anything.
“Expecting company?” I asked, looking at the tray with a hoagie and chips sitting in front of the window.
“I know you like them. I always order you one,” he said without enthusiasm.
“How’d you know I was coming?” I said.
There was more silence and his expression was nothing to write home about.
“I didn’t. I always order extra for you. Never can tell when you’ll decide to drop by. I want to be prepared, you know. Being prepared is a good thing, but you knew that.”
“No, I didn’t. You order extra every night?” I said.
“Yes. You used to come every night. So I order for you every night. See how considerate I am?”
“That’s nice of you,” I said, taking the seat between the bed and the window, since he hadn’t told me to leave.
“Don’t do that again,” he said, as if I used the wrong fork on my hoagie.
“Sit down?” I asked. “Or eat the food you ordered for me?”
“You know what I’m talking about. You know you’re the only one who comes to see me. You left me alone, Martin,” he said, objecting to it.
“You pissed me off, Greg. I come here because I like being with you. I understand I’m the only one who comes to see you, but when you treat me like you own me, I think you don’t appreciate me. I have other things to do,” I said.
The real truth was that he hurt my feelings and I made him pay for it. There was nothing I wanted to do more than be there with him. While I kept my mind off him for two weeks, but as soon as I allowed myself to think about him, I was on my way back to be with him.
Greg wasn’t happy with me but he didn’t ask me to leave. His irresistible charm, the thing that one the day for him every day, had failed. I’d walked out on him, proving I could walk away. He didn’t like it but he understood why I stopped coming to see him.
He was careful in how he expressed his displeasure with me. He also made sure I saw him differently. He didn’t want me to think of him as just another pretty face. He had other tools handy to tempt me into staying. Greg’s attitude had changed. The status quo was no longer acceptable.
It was like the first day I came to see him, except we had a lot more to go on about each other than we did the first day I walked down into his ward. Then I was a guy Greg had let pleasure him one time, after he’d beat my socks off at pool, not to mention most of the rest of my clothing. What we knew about each other is, I would, and he’d let me. Everything else I knew came from outside sources.
I ate the hoagie and the chips as he watched me. I didn’t eat before I came to see him, because I was nervous and didn’t want to vomit for him on my first visit. I didn’t know how it would go. My experience with people was limited and loving someone was getting in way over my head, but I ate the sandwich because I was hungry and felt halfway certain he wasn’t going to ban me from his kingdom.
“How’s school?” he asked, once I wiped my mouth and stopped chewing.
“Over. I’ve got two tests and a paper to go but classes are over. This is the final week,” I said. “Track ends Saturday. I still have to practice.”
“Yeah, I’ve got to take some tests before they’ll graduate me. I won’t be there when the class graduates.”
“I can help you,” I offered.
“You smart, Martin?” he asked.
“No, not very. I’m smart enough to be getting out of school after a hundred years.”
“I should have graduated last year. It doesn’t bother me not to graduate with you guys. I always felt out of place,” he confessed.
“You, out of place?”
“Go figure, huh? Lost all my friends. Being in the hospital makes you look pretty lame, especially when you’re the king. Herbie’s the king now. He’s got that long skinny hot dog of a dick. I’m longer than you. I’m longer than you, he tells me every time I try to explain I got twice the dick he’s got. He thinks long is what it’s all about.”
“You had an accident. It doesn’t look like anything. Herbie doesn’t come up? He’s no good at pool. How does he qualify as the king?”
“Herbie will do anything. He’s the king because he’s got a ten-inch pecker. You’d be surprised how many guys would pay to see it, but Herbie will show you for free. Anywhere.”
“Herbie’s so skinny,” I said. “Didn’t see the attraction.”
“Attraction is in the danger, the forbidden fruit. No one wants to see but they stand in line to look. Herbie doesn’t have good sense. I told you that.”
“Just sat and watched TV the time I saw him.”
“Herbie wouldn’t come up. He’s too young anyway. No one but family and folks over eighteen.”
“Herbie’s not eighteen. I’m eighteen. I thought he started the sex deal in Germany,” I said.
“I wasn’t into letting guys yank on my crank, until Herbie started it. He was younger than me but he knew stuff I never thought about. He was on it all the time.”
“The plot thickens,” I said. “You were competing with a younger boy. You didn’t like that.”
Greg stared at me. I could see him thinking of all the things we’d talked about. He’d never said much about Germany. He got held back there. Doug had given me the other pieces.
“Doug’s got a big mouth,” he said.
Greg looked at me again. He wasn’t sure how much I knew. I didn’t know a lot but Greg didn’t know that. I figured it was worth a try to get more of the story from his point of view. The part Doug wouldn’t tell me, but I knew there was more to it than what I knew.
“Big mouth. He told me about being in Germany. Told me about the German boys and Herbie getting together. They asking Herbie to bring you boys over. That’s all.”
“I was young,” he said defensively. “Everyone did it. Herbie was in the middle of it.”
“Herbie was younger,” I said.
“Herbie did more than anyone and my innocent little brother went right along with the program. Did squirt tell you he was the first one Herbie took over there? His hairless little ass had the German boys hot to trot.”
“No,” I said. “I didn’t hear about that.”
“No, he wouldn’t tell on himself. Told you what I did but didn’t mention what he did.”
“And what Herbie did,” I said, looking for more.
“Herbie’ll do you for a cigarette. Boy hasn’t got a lick of sense. I protect him.”
“and he… does you. You seem to get along well,” I said. “Doug told me you go way back.”
“I’ve known Herbie all my life. I try to look after him. We use to sleep over all the time.”
“Does have its advantages. You provide his cigarettes?”
“I don’t have to provide anything. He wants what I got. We’re friends. Herbie hasn’t been able to leave me alone since he was ten. Truth be known, he started all this shit wanting to play with me all the time. I woke up one night with his hand in my underwear. I just let him do it. I didn’t know we’d be at it all this time.”
“Hard life,” I said. “Herbie knows what he wants.”
“You don’t know half as much as you think you do. Doug only hung around the German kids for a few weeks. He was fooling around with them before Herbie took me there. Doug didn’t know any better. He thought it was a game. Once I went over there, he stopped. Didn’t want me seeing what he was up to.”
“No, he didn’t say a lot about that. Said you fit right in. Liked playing pool with the German boys.”
“I was 12. They let me win a couple of games. Most of those guys were 14 or 15. It felt pretty neat having older guys make a fuss over me. They knew what they were doing.”
“You kept playing until you were the king from what I understand,” I said.
“Two can play that game,” Greg bragged. “I liked being the center of attention.”
“How old were you when you were the king?” I asked.
“I was 15. We came back when I was 16. No one has beat me yet,” Greg said. “I’m still the king. Most of the guys at our parties played with the Germans.”
“Ronnie plays pretty good. Was he in Germany.”
“Ronnie’s older than I am. He had this little skinny dick and not a hair on him until he was 14. He wanted to beat me so bad. He beat me all right. Beat me raw a few nights. He’d kneel down in front of my and stroke away. He still just wants to beat me once, as in me beating him off that is.”
“He’s grown up,” I said. “He’s a stud. Looks like he could kick and ass or two.”
“Still the kid who asked me, ‘is that enough yet. My arm’s tired.’ He was such a pussy.”
“Ronnie?” I asked. “He’s a stud.”
“Ronnie,” he said. “He hates my ass. Told you about how much you didn’t know. Everyone knows he took care of me before he became a stud. He knows it. I know it. He hates it. He still thinks he can beat me just once. Hasn’t yet.”
“Chet & Tony?” I asked.
“Chet’s cool. Tony wants something but he can’t make himself stay to get it. Boy’s got a dick on him. He might give me a run for my money one day. He’d make a nice boyfriend, Martin.”
“Tony. Five foot nothing Tony? Didn’t strike me as particularly sexual. Quit before he lost his shorts. Chet seemed to like getting naked. Just sat there naked in front of everyone. Tony left.”
”Chet likes getting naked in front of people. He was always naked in Germany. Tony wants something he can’t ask for. He has a hungry look in his eye. Not that different from the way you looked at me that first time we played. Tony will go for it one day but not in front of the crew. He’s afraid to do that.”
“Tony? I’d figure that was Chet,” I said.
“Nope, Tony. Boy’s got a big dick. Afraid to use it. He always pulls out at the moment of truth. Doesn’t mind playing but never wins and only rarely gets naked.”
“You’re still the king,” I said,
“I’m still the king,” Greg said, feeling himself and making no attempt to hide his arousal from me.
This was the new Greg. He had things at his disposal to keep me coming back. He didn’t need to let me see his erection but there was no attempt to hide it. The ever present sheet between me and the full picture was no longer necessary for Greg to be comfortable. It was in his interest to be comfortable letting me see what he thought would keep me coming back for more. He still didn’t understand that it was him and not his big dick that had me coming back. How did I make that clear to him without scaring him off?
Greg was loosening up. He liked talking about himself. He liked bragging. I wondered why he was bragging about this particular subject, since it told me a lot more about what motivated him. He wasn’t the least bit bashful, but I guess I knew that from our pool encounter.
We’d gone far enough down that road for him to know I was no threat to tell anyone anything lurid about him, but I thought it had more to do with me leaving and now returning. He was revealing more than he’d ever revealed before, thinking these were the kinds of things that would keep me close.
Greg could tell by the look I gave him, he had me hooked on the lust in his past. Why this was the time to tell me the torrid details didn’t matter. Keeping me on the hook did. The details he added to what I knew told me plenty.
Greg might have been way smarter than I gave him credit for being. He just might have liked talking about himself and the boys who had liked him plenty, because he was the king, and being his subjects, some boys did what he liked. Others did what they liked, as I had done what I liked.
Hail to the king, Greg the Grand.
I sat the tray back in front of the window and rested my right arm on the edge of his bed. His left leg, the one with the cast, moved out from under the sheet and rested against my hand a little above the knee. His skin was warm and dark hairs had begun to grow on his thigh.
When I looked up at his face the sheet had now come off the leg up to his crotch where his dusty blond pubic hair was visible. He had no top on and so his chest was bare. His eyes, as always, were on me. I’d make the discoveries he’d intended to show me. His erection was no secret and it was as impressive and exciting as before, only this time it rested up on his belly.
“Herbie is the one who started it all,” he said, remembering for me. “He’s why I like guys feeling on me. Girls are too hard to get. They want a promise first. Boys just need you to get hard. Half will gag and half will want to touch it.”
“The strip pool and fooling with the German boys? He started it but you took over.”
“That was later. First we were at Fort Lewis, where we went to elementary school together. We met there in 2nd grade.”
“You go back a ways,” I said.
“That too. At 10 he had this long skinny dick. No balls. Little tiny ball sac and this four inches of lose dick. He wanted everyone to know what he had in his pants. He couldn’t do anything with it. It just hung there but he showed it to everyone.”
“Before Germany?” I asked.
“Before Germany. We were kids. He always wanted me to show him mine. Kids do that, you know. I did. He liked to make it hard. He’d play with me all night some times, when he slept over. He stayed over a lot then. His parents are divorced. I stayed over his house, when his father was out of town. It’s all he wanted to do after a while. Felt good to me. I didn’t know anything.”
“Probably not unusual,” I said, not hearing such a thing before.
“I grew and got hair at eleven.”
“Eleven?” I said. “I was twelve, I think. No one noticed.”
“Herbie noticed. Made him pay more attention. We didn’t have to sleep over. Boy didn’t have a hair on him besides on his head. Little tiny balls and this winner size dick swinging there. He was fascinated by mine. It got fat first. He’d pull on it and that puppy got stiff and stayed that way. Boy was addicted to dick.
“When I was maturing pretty fast, he stops paying attention. Which seemed strange, as in where was my handyman when I needed him. Herbie is no where to be seen. I find out him and my brother are going off together. My brothers no big deal and I can’t figure out the attraction.
“I figured Doug was letting Herbie give him daily exams. Someone new. Then I find out that Herbie was at the German youth club and he’s found a whole new supply of dicks to pull on. I went over there to keep him from making a fool of himself,” Greg said. “I try to look out for the boy.”
“But you didn’t make him stop?” I asked, knowing this part of the story.
“No, they let me win. There I was in front of the German boys and they’re touching my dick. Something about getting attention. I liked it. I could tell Herbie to quit going over later on. This was better than Herbie having his hand in my underwear all the time.
“I may have felt funny for about a minute, but I liked it. They made me feel good about liking it. There was a guy there, Kort, had the biggest damn dick I’d ever seen. I mean we were all light weights compared to him. Thick, long, hard as stone. Other boys felt mine and then felt his.”
“You felt it?”
“Yeah, that damn Herbie had me thinking feeling a guys dick was cool. I knew how it felt and feeling a man size dick got me even harder. I wanted a dick that size,” he said, thinking about the incident.
“Did you?” I asked.
“Damn right I did. Kort said it before he went to go in the Army. ‘You’re biggest. You’re the king.’
“Once I took mine out, different boys felt me. Herbie times five. It was the hottest thing I ever did. First time I shot off. They just kept feeling on me. One boy and then another. I just about passed out when I came. I didn’t tell them it was my first one.”
“How many guys were there?” I asked.
“Five, maybe six German boys the first time. Herbie and Doug. Maybe another boy. Most of us were 12 or 13. Kort, Will, and Deter were 15 and 16. They were in charge. They made up the rules as they went along. Deter worked in the youth club and had the keys to lock the doors.”
“Why didn’t anything like that happen to me?” I asked.
“You didn’t know me before. Now you’re in on it. I might get you to feel me a little so you don’t owe so much the next time we play pool. Get ahead of the game, so to speak.”
“An interesting offer, but we’re in an open ward,” I said. “I don’t like the idea of making a show out of it. No offense. It’s cool if you like that sort of thing.”
“The divider is closed. I might be really grateful if you’d just give it a little feel, Martin.”
“It’s a piece of cloth. Someone can walk down here,” I protested.
“We’d hear,” he explained, looping his thumb under the head and lifting it vertical to his belly again. “I’m still growing. I think I’m bigger than when you played with it.
You’d be able to tell me. You gave it a good going over that day. What do you think? Do you think it looks bigger?”
“It’s a dick, Greg. Size isn’t everything,” I said, checking it out again, never getting enough looks at him.
“It’s what got me the attention. Size can make things fun. I’d rather have it than not. Maybe I wouldn’t be so up front with it if it wasn’t so big, maybe I would.”
“I never got the choice,” I said, realizing Greg’s made three or four of my modest presentation.
“Please!”
“Not here,” I said.
“I know you want to. You can’t take your eyes off it. Why not just feel it for a few minutes. No one is coming. Does anyone ever come? Put your hand under the sheet and you can feel all you want. If someone comes, you can slip your hand away from it. I’ll cover you.”
Was this the hook? He figured if he let me yank on his dick for a while, I’d be like Herbie and keep coming back for more? I understood what happened when he got out of the hospital. I was going to be yesterday’s news. My hand would be old-hat.
Maybe I should take him up on it. I had an unobstructed view of him now and he wanted to give me all the feeling time that it took to make me happy, but did I want it to always come back to sex?
It always did because of how I felt about him, but his game was to be pleasured and there were guys waiting to give him a hand any time he wanted, once he went home. I was resisting the idea that I’d jump on his dick any time he offered it to me. I wanted more.
It wasn’t easy but I would have felt pretty small if all he had to do was show me his cock to get me on it. My life wasn’t going to be about getting touched or touching someone every chance I got. That was an idea that didn’t appeal to me. As much as I liked him, I didn’t like that.
“Not going to happen, big guy,” I said firmly, realizing tomorrow was another day.
If he kept at me I’d do it, because I wanted to do it, but not today. Toady I would keep my dignity and sense of propriety. Did it matter if I put off the inevitable for a day?
His eyes were pleading and his face showed his disappointment. He let go of his dick and it slapped his belly with a loud distinctive sound.
“I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable,” he said sadly.
“Yes, you did. You wanted me to squirm, grab for it. Then you could yank it away and laugh at me wanting it.”
“I would not, Martin,” he protested. “I’m not like that.”
“Yes you are. You’re exactly like that. I like you Greg. Your dick happens to be attached to you. It’s very nice and yes, I’d like to pull on it again, but not here. I can wait until we are in a place where we both can enjoy ourselves.”
He looked at me and didn’t say anything about that. The corner of the sheet covered just his erection. His balls and the spot behind them were in plain sight. I couldn’t look at his face without looking across all his best parts and it’s what he intended. He smiled when my eyes wandered.
My mouth was dry and if I’d have touched him I’d have made a mess in my pants, and that didn’t appeal to me either. Life could be a bitch some days, but at least I was with the man I loved, in spite of his warped sexual appetite.
The scary part was that I’d do anything he wanted to do, but not there. Not yet.