Ever since his camping trip, there were things Dill couldn’t get out of his mind. He was sitting in the Terrytown Library again along with the usual crew. Today, however, there was a boy he didn’t know, one about his age. He was sitting reading a book at a table across the room, and every now and then, Dill would see him glance up, look his way, and if their eyes met, quickly return to his book.
On any other day, Dill might have taken this as a positive sign. Maybe this boy was looking for a friend as sincerely as he was. But this wasn’t any other day. This was a day when the events at the old mill were invading his mind more than usual.
He sat fidgeting at the table. His memories were arousing, and where he was sitting left his lower half open for viewing to anyone positioned low enough to see under the table. The boy across the room probably couldn’t see anything, but Dill wasn’t sure.
He wiggled a little again and knew he should adjust himself, but as he looked up, the boy was looking his way again, and Dill couldn’t put his hand down there to fix himself with the boy looking!
As he was wondering what to do, he noticed the woman in the business suit get up and walk toward the stacks, then change course at the last minute and walk to the stairway. The library had a second and third floor, but he’d never seen anyone, not even a librarian, go up there. He knew there were specialized books on the second floor and old newspapers and magazines on the third. Perhaps when school was in session and the kids who attended the local college were back in town, those resources were used. Or perhaps, now that computers were available, all that information could be accessed without coming to the library and climbing stairs at all.
Eventually, the lady came back down, a book in her hand. She sat back down at her table. During the time she was gone, Dill had finally been able to adjust himself, but he still was feeling the arousal that the memory of being at the mill was bringing him. The grassy slope near the mill pond. Camping in the clearing where he’d undressed. The feeling of the night air on his bare skin. The feeling he might be caught… The feelings kept coming back, as did his desire.
Desire for what? But he didn’t have to ask that. He knew. He knew how it had felt to wander around naked, and he wanted to feel that again. Just allowing himself to think about it was raising his heartbeat. Among other things.
Against his will, his eyes moved to the staircase. He’d never gone up them except on a library tour with others. Never seen anyone else go up, either, until the lady did. She’d gone to the second floor, obviously, because there were no books on the third. As far as he knew, no one had a need to go to the top.
Just thinking what he was thinking was making him flush. He stood, not able to sit still longer. He put one hand in his pants pocket so he could push out the fabric of his shorts, making how he was feeling, how his body was reacting to that feeling, less obvious. Without turning to look at the other boy, he purposefully walked to the stairs and on up.
He didn’t stop at the second floor but proceeded to the third. There he found floor-to-ceiling shelving, just like on the other two floors, but here the shelves were filled with piles of old newspapers, some of the pages yellowed, some looking very brittle.
Dill’s heart was beating fast. The thought of being caught was bouncing around in his head, but his urges were more insistent. He looked around, then chose to walk to the back of the room. He walked halfway down the narrow aisle and stopped. The room was dead silent and smelled slightly musty. He could only see newspapers, except when he turned and looked to each end of the aisle.
Then, nervous and heart racing, he began undressing. In a moment, he was completely naked, even to his shoes and socks. His heart was thudding in his chest and it felt like his face was on fire. He stood still for several moments; then, still in the stacks, he walked nearly to the middle of the room where the shelves began and cautiously looked out. He was still the only one in the room.
Boldly, he stepped out and walked toward the top of the stairs, his erection proudly leading the way. No one was coming up. He was completely alone. He looked around. The area at the top of the stairs was an open space; the stacks began on both sides and ran to the far ends of the large room. He saw there were two tables against one wall at the back of the open space, probably there so someone could set down a paper or bundle of papers to look through. There were two straight-backed chairs. Feeling very bold, he walked over and sat down, his heart still racing.
After a moment, he stood up and walked back to the stairs. No one was coming up. He stepped into the middle of the room and twirled around, then bounced up and down, very aware of the effect these actions had on his erection. He wanted to grasp it, but thought, no, that’s for later.
He walked to the stacks on the other side of the room from where he’d gone to undress. He hadn’t been there yet, exploring, but found these stacks were just more papers, most of them bundled. Finally, having seen enough, he walked back out to the middle of the room where the stairs ended.
He walked out into the open, and there, standing at the head of the stairs, he found the boy who’d been sitting at the table and glancing at him.
Dill stopped and just stared, totally frozen, absolutely unable to even think. The boy was looking at him with an unreadable expression, running his eyes up and down Dill’s body. Then, as Dill watched, still stunned and immobile, the boy suddenly smiled and, incredibly, began undressing.
««« »»»
When they were both standing there naked, both sporting erections, both blushing, the boy said, “Hi. I’m Kirk.”
Dill just looked at him and then, suddenly, began laughing. He was on an emotional high, his mental processes had failed him, and involuntary laughter became the way to release his tension. He laughed and found he couldn’t stop. Eventually, Kirk joined him. They laughed till they couldn’t any longer and then, blushing as was Dill, Kirk asked, “Where are your clothes?”
“In the back. I left them there. It was scarier that way.”
Kirk nodded. “I get it. More exciting. More dangerous. Uh, do you do this often?”
By now, just talking, both of them were losing their erections. It seemed perfectly normal to be standing and talking in the nude, even if neither had done it before or even contemplated it.
“No. This is my first time.” And then, after a pause, “You?”
Kirk giggled. “Nope. First for me, too.”
“Why did you do it, then?”
“I thought you’d be horribly embarrassed if I just stood here and looked at you. Besides, it looked like fun. And, my god, exciting! I didn’t, uh, interrupt anything, did I?” And he made the universal motion understood by all boys.
“No! I was just…well, I just wanted to be naked where there was the possibility of being caught, although I did NOT want to be caught. I didn’t think I’d be able to live that down. But the idea of it, well…”
“I know. Exciting.”
Both boys grinned at each other. Then Kirk said, “We’ve just moved here. Middle of the summer, and I don’t know how to meet anyone. But now I’ve met you, and if you’re the way people are around here, this is going to be a very interesting place to live.” He laughed again, taking any sort of embarrassment or criticism out of the remark.
Dill liked him right away. Could this be the friend he was looking for? He really, really hoped so.
Then Kirk said something else, and Dill’s hopes turned to fear.
“Uh, you wandering around naked like this. Does that mean you’re gay?”
Kirk saw what that did to the expression on Dill’s face, and immediately backtracked. “Oh, I’m sorry. Ignore that. I wasn’t thinking. See, I think I’m gay, and when I started to think that last year, I told people back home. Parents, friends, people at school, you know, just people. I thought it was better to be up front when I wasn’t sure. No secrets to hide that way, no problems as I grew older with the parental units and friends, as they’d already know. So I’m used to being out, sorta out because I’m not sure I’m gay, but I know some kids that are gay aren’t out, and I apologize for asking.”
“You’re gay?” This was turning into a very strange day for Dill. He’d thought the day he’d camped out and then witnessed what he had was as strange as things would ever get. Now, this.
“I don’t know, but think so. I’m only thirteen. My friends and other guys I know all are starting to look at girls, and I’m not. I do like looking at boys, though.”
“Oh. Well, no one’s ever asked me that before. I haven’t even thought about it before.” Which was a lie. Dill had thought about it. A lot. He thought he was gay. He thought maybe people could tell, and that’s why he never had any friends. But he wasn’t going to just come out and say that to a kid he’d never met.
But he liked this kid. Liked him a lot. He was Dill’s size, maybe a little stockier; Dill was quite slender. Kirk had a shock of messy brown hair and bright, inquisitive, sparkling brown eyes. And, from what he’d seen, and he’d seen it all, Dill knew Kirk had a beautiful body. Just thinking about it, he started to rise again.
Kirk saw that because he happened to be staring at that part of Dill’s anatomy just then. Both boys looked into each other’s eyes, and the hardening went faster.
Dill blushed. “Maybe we ought to get dressed,” he said.
“Maybe,” said Kirk and smiled again.
««« »»»
They came down the stairs together. Dill received a shock. When they were halfway down from the second floor to the first, he met the scowling young man who read magazines all day. The guy looked at him, and Dill got the sudden idea that this guy knew all about what he’d done with Kirk. The guy was looking at Dill very suspiciously, and Dill couldn’t help himself; he blushed. Had the guy figured it out? Dill had been squirming in his seat at the table. He’d adjusted himself, then climbed the stairs, and shortly after, another kid the same age had gone up after him. That had to be suspicious, and a guy not that much older could easily guess what was happening upstairs. And he probably wanted to go up and see for himself.
Dill walked on down the stairs past the guy without looking into his face. But when he was back at his table with Kirk now sitting across from him, he was sure he’d guessed right, because the guy on the stairs had watched them go sit down and then had come back down himself without ever going all the way up. He had to have just been going up to check Dill out. What if he’d gone up and found Dill up there—naked?
It didn’t bear thinking about.