The rest of the day was nerve–racking for Todd. He didn’t know what to expect. Being in trouble at school was an entirely new experience. His shyness made any sort of spotlight focused on him, any singling out, extremely uncomfortable, and he imagined all sorts of humiliating and terrible things that might happen when he met with Mr. McCluskey that afternoon. He already knew that fairness wasn’t a concept Mr. McCluskey understood, certainly not one he paid heed to. It wasn’t that he’d never met with unfairness before, even from school administrators, but he had hoped things would be different here.
Three–thirty finally rolled around. He’d been looking nervously at the clock for the past 40 minutes. When the bell rang, he gathered his stuff, then walked to his locker. He thought it best not to have anything with him when he went to the office. He couldn’t explain why he thought that, but it seemed right to him.
He entered the admin office at three–thirty–five. All the women were gone. The lights were still on, but the room was empty. He waited for five minutes, but no one came. Not sure what to do but knowing he shouldn’t delay seeing the vice–principal, he walked very hesitantly to Mr. McCluskey’s office, feeling very insecure about going behind the counter without permission to do so, but needing to get to Mr. McCluskey’s office without more delay. Timidly, he knocked on the door.
It suddenly opened, and Mr. McCluskey was standing over him.
“About time. You’re late. Get in here.”
Todd entered the office. It was just like it had been earlier. Mr. McCluskey walked back to his desk, sat down, then pointed to the chair. Todd sat.
And that was it. Mr. McCluskey began working on some papers on his desk, occasionally making an entry into his computer. He didn’t acknowledge Todd at all.
Todd just sat there. Five minutes passed, then five more. At first, Todd was scared. Then, as time passed with Mr. McCluskey making no move to recognize he was even there, he began to feel angry. He was being dissed. He knew it. It was just something else he didn’t feel he deserved. He began to wonder what would happen if he simply stood up and walked out. It felt good to think about it. But then, he realized he’d have to walk home, and with a damaged ankle, that wouldn’t be good. And it would take him forever to get there.
He could call home, but wasn’t about to do that.
Of course, Mr. McCluskey hadn’t said anything about going home other than he should worry more about the shit he was in here at school. So he probably should be doing just that, not even thinking about how he’d get home yet.
When he was done thinking about all this, he began getting fidgety. The longer he sat, the more worked up he was getting.
And then it all changed. There was a knock on the door, and Mr. McCluskey was up and opening it. Standing in the doorway was Geoff Harper.
“About time,” said Mr. McCluskey. “You were supposed to be here half an hour ago.”
“Mr. Nichols held me over. I told him you were waiting for me. But he seemed upset about something and wouldn’t listen.” There was a smirk on Geoff’s face when he said that. He was a large, heavy and unpleasant looking boy wearing ratty clothes and unkempt dark blond hair that needed washing. His face was round and usually wore a look of contempt. His eyes were dark gray, about the color of 20–year–old blacktop that’s been in the bright sun too long.
“Get your ass in that chair. I’ll find out from Bruce Nichols what that was all about and probably roast your ass for it. He’s too nice.”
“Too nice,” Geoff said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Mr. McCluskey’s anger quite obviously did not intimidate him in the slightest.
Geoff slumped over to the empty chair and dropped into it. He looked at Todd, who pulled his body away from him. “Hey, it’s the faggot! What’s he doin’ here?”
Mr. McCluskey, on his way to his desk, stopped and slapped Geoff on the back of his head hard, hard enough to knock his head forward. “Any more of that, and I stop being a nice guy. I’m damn tired of warning you, Geoff. You know what we said, one more incident and you’re out. As I count it, you’ve now had two since then, one with Bruce, and now this one. That remark breaks the school’s policy on harassment based on sexual orientation.”
He sat down in his chair and spoke to Geoff. “You know, I should probably just forget what I was planning. Why shouldn’t I just expel you? I have all the cause in the world, all documented, all ready to be sent to the school board. Get you out of my hair once and for all and forget you ever were here. What do you think?”
Geoff looked at him, at his hard eyes, and some of the smirk that had seemed a permanent facial feature slowly disappeared. When he spoke, his voice lacked the challenging edge it usually had. “Hey, Mr. McCluskey, I was just joking around with this kid here. You know how I am. I don’t know if he really is a fag or not.” Then he grinned.
Mr. McCluskey sighed and stood up. “OK, that’s it. Clean out your locker. You’re done here. Now I have to decide what to do with the extra 20 hours a week I’ve been wasting on trying to save your sorry ass. You have to decide how to tell your parents before they get the official phone call tomorrow.”
“Hey, come on! I was joking. I told you that.”
Todd looked over at the boy in surprise. He’d never once heard any tone of voice from him but a mean, derisive one. Now, he actually sounded worried. Or even scared.
Mr. McCluskey leaned over the desk, put his face in Geoff’s and said, very softly, “I’m very tired of all your jokes, all your bullshit. You’ve played your last card here. No more, Geoff. No more. I’d hate to think I’ve spent all this time trying to help you for nothing, but I’ve had it. The only reason I’m going to let you off the hook this one last time is I have some idea of what will happen to you if I don’t. But—it’s up to you now. Right now, your life can go either way. You want it to be the easier way, you show some respect, you show some willingness to cooperate, to do what you’re told, to follow the rules. You stop being sarcastic and stupid and an asshole. You go along with what I’m going to do today and you have a chance here. A very slim one, I’m not sure you have enough discipline in you to follow through, not for very long, but you do have a chance. You’ve already had your one more remark. You’ve already enjoyed your one last time of showing just how unconcerned you are about everything and everyone. You don’t have any more one last chances, Geoff. None. They’re all used up. Do you understand me? Do you really get it? Now answer me.”
The soft voice seemed to have more effect on Geoff than the words. He looked startled. He looked like he was realizing Mr. McCluskey was serious.
“You mean it?”
“I’ve had it with you, Geoff. You have to start taking things seriously. I’m not taking any more shit from you. No more little comments followed by, hey, that was a joke. I’m not interested in how funny you are, how tough you think you are or how much you want to show people that everything here is beneath you. It’s entirely in your hands now. If you want to stay, then act like it. If you don’t, just keep on playing the clown, just break the rules once more.”
Geoff didn’t answer, just looked at Mr. McCluskey, who glared back at him.
Todd watched all this. It was obvious the two had spent a lot of time together, had had a lot of problems with each other. Todd’s problem was he didn’t especially care. He disliked both of them. He was also curious why he was in the room as this had nothing to do with him.
He was quickly to find out that wasn’t the case.
There was silence while Mr. McCluskey gathered himself. Then, he turned to Todd.
“OK, hotshot. So you don’t want detention. That’s where we stand, right?”
Todd was startled. Mr. McCluskey’s attitude when dealing with Geoff had been different from the brusque, hostile attitude he’d had with him. Now, that demeanor was back again. It was as though Mr. McCluskey was madder at him, less tolerant of him, than of Geoff. Another act of unfairness. Todd would have been irate if he weren’t so terrified of the man.
The unexpected question suddenly thrown at him surprised him, the manner in which it was asked was disturbing, but it was easy to answer. He did so, his small voice reflecting his intimidation. “No, sir. I didn’t do anything to deserve it.” He would have liked to have said that what he deserved was an apology, but didn’t have the intestinal fortitude to push it that far.
“Well, I think you did, and my opinion counts for a lot more than yours. Yours, I don’t give a crap about. I just have to decide what sort of punishment you get for wising off to me, being discourteous and disobedient.”
He then turned to Geoff, who was still looking less cocky than usual. Again, when he spoke, Todd could detect a softer tone of voice which he didn’t understand at all. “And you. I assume you’ve decided to go along with what I want. The proper answer here is, ‘Yes, sir. Anything, sir.’ In fact, that’s the only answer. Now say it.”
Geoff didn’t want to. He almost never did what he was told, certainly not exactly what he was told. Mr. McCluskey’s eyes, however, told him he had too. And for all his arrogance and bravado, he didn’t want to get thrown out of school. He knew what would happen at home if he did.
Very meekly, which was something new for him, he said, “Yes, sir. Anything, sir.”
Mr. McCluskey glared at him, then said sarcastically, “That didn’t kill you, did it? You’re still exactly the same as you were before you said it. You might think about that a little. Had you said anything else, you’d be gone by now, and things would be much different.”
He held Geoff’s gaze until the boy looked away.
He swiveled his chair around and looked at the wall behind him for a few moments, leaving the boys sitting staring at his back. Then he turned back around.
“OK, here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to enjoy this. Geoff, you’ve been giving Todd hell. If it were most any other kid you’d been doing that to, he’d have come to me and gotten it stopped, and gotten you kicked out of school to boot, so everyone would have been better off. Everyone would have been better off except you, but no one gives a rat’s ass about you because of the way you behave. That’s what someone else would have done, but Todd”—Mr. McCluskey turned from Geoff to Todd—“you didn’t, for whatever reason. All that did was buy Geoff some more time and yourself more hassling. That was your own fault. You didn’t do anything to stop what he was doing to you, and so you must suffer the consequences.”
He glared at Todd for a moment, then sat back and relaxed his gaze so he could see them both. “Geoff, I’ve come to the end of the rope with you. You’ll do exactly as I say now, or, as promised, you’re out of here. Todd, you’re being punished for insolence and all that other stuff I just said. Here’s what we’re going to do. Todd, it’s now your job to get Geoff through this semester without failing any classes. He’s failing almost everything. You’ll work with him in the library after school each day for two weeks, and then after that whenever he asks. And he’ll ask whenever he has a test coming up or he’s falling behind in any class or doesn’t understand something. I’ll know when that happens because I’ll have his teachers send me weekly reports of how he’s doing. If he’s slipping rather than improving, and hasn’t asked for your help, he’s gone, and you’re in trouble.
“And as for your part of the deal, Geoff, what your job is, you’re going to protect Todd. At school, on the bus, in the cafeteria, in gym, wherever, your job is to stop anyone from bullying or teasing or doing anything to him. In order to make that easier, I’m getting your classes changed to his. That means new teachers for you, so a new start. Some of Todd’s classes are AP classes, but that only means you’re going to have to work a lot harder, and Todd will have to help you more. And of course, if Todd tells me he’s being bothered by anyone, including yourself, bye–bye, you’re gone.”
Mr. McCluskey sat back and smiled. “I’m going to love this. Kill two birds with one stone. Punish you, Todd, by making you hang out with and help the boy you probably hate worst in the whole school. Geoff, make you do your school work, behave, help someone you’ve been making life a nightmare for, and incidentally get your grades up.”
He stopped then, looked at both, and resumed his perpetual scowl. “Do either of you object? I have much worse things in mind for you, Todd, and Geoff, you can’t object.”
He looked at them, gave them only a second to say something, then slammed his open hand on the top of the desk, hard, making them both jump. “OK, every day this week, you meet me here after school, then go to the library right afterward. You both tell me how it’s going when we all meet here. We start tomorrow. Todd, you were worried about a ride. We have a couple of late buses for kids who participate in after school activities and the ones serving detention. You can ride the one going in your direction. It’s in the school parking lot and leaves about 45 minutes from now. Plenty of time for you to catch it.
“There’s one thing more. You guys have to get to know each other. This can be easy or hard. You can be civil to each other, or you can be enemies. It’ll be a lot better for both of you if you’re friends, or at least affable with each other, though I can’t control that when I’m not with you. However, tomorrow in study hall, which you both have together along with every other class, I want you to go to the auditorium. It’ll be empty. You go there, sit down, and each one of you will tell the other about yourself, what your life is like. That’s a first step. This isn’t a request. It’s an order and I’ll ask at our meeting tomorrow night if you both did it. Be like a pop quiz, I’ll ask you about each other and you’d better get them all right. Geoff, you have no choice. Todd, you do, you can blow this whole thing off, and then take what comes from that. Your choice. OK, I’m done here. Beat it.”
He stood and pointed to the door.
Todd was stunned. He hated Geoff. He also was shy and a loner. The idea of working with this boy, being close to him most or all of the school day, was repugnant to him. And two weeks! For what! But, he’d heard rumors about some of the punishments Mr. McCluskey gave kids on detention. Stuff like sanding down old scarred desktops by hand, sometimes taking hours and hours to do so. Or putting on rubber gloves and scrubbing out the toilets and urinals. Or painting all the bleachers around the football field after school while other kids were walking past yelling insults or laughing at the ones doing the painting. He’d overheard another kid talking about that, and saying the guys painting had to wear smocks over their clothes. Smocks supplied by the school. Pink smocks. He didn’t know how much truth there was in any of that, but he didn’t want to find out. At least doing what he’d been asked to do with Geoff would mean he was somewhat in control of the situation. Because, he’d quickly seen something else in this whole deal that gave him pause.
Geoff wouldn’t be able to harass him any longer. That would stop immediately, because one word from him and Geoff would be gone. He could have him expelled any time he wanted to. So, he could more or less have Geoff doing whatever he wanted. He had him by the nuts.
Geoff was up and out of the chair as soon as Mr. McCluskey rose. Todd followed him. When they were alone in the hallway, Todd started walking toward his locker, his limp still giving him problems. He had to get his books and homework assignments, then get to the parking lot.
Geoff watched him walk off, watched the slight limp. He thought to say something, something sarcastic, but stifled it. He didn’t stop himself because of any feelings of remorse. He simply realized that with one word from Todd, he would be kicked out of school. So, he had to change, even if it was only to stop saying some things that he’d grown accustomed to saying.
He was aware enough to realize he’d be having to do a lot of that.
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Todd sat alone on the bus ride home. He chose a seat by himself when he got on, as he always did, and no one sat down next to him. He had a lot to think about. He did, all the way to his stop, and then throughout the final walk home.
It had stopped raining, but the day was still overcast and gray. The breeze was still chilly, and he zipped up his jacket as he got off the bus. No one else had got off at his stop. He was by himself, as usual. He started walking.
The houses on his street were each on half–acre lots, with manicured landscaping. Even though the development was less than two years old, the trees throughout the area were mature; a few had been left by the developers, the rest had been brought in. All the houses were expansive and reflected the great affluence of those who lived there.
Todd walked up his long driveway. His ankle was hurting a little. He thought how lucky he was not to have had to try to walk all the way home on it. Thinking that, he began getting mad again. He could and did get mad a lot when he was by himself.
He knew most people would be shocked that he wasn’t a happy boy. They’d look at where he lived, the clothes he wore, the fact he was decent looking, the fact he was quite intelligent, and they’d think he had it made. They wouldn’t see the almost debilitating shyness, nor the life he had at school and home.
He used his key to open the front door and went inside. The house was vast and silent. He crossed the large tiled entry hall to the carpeted stairs and started up, holding on to the polished oak banister. He found the extra weight of rising on his bad ankle more painful than simply walking the short distance home had been. It took him some time, but he managed to get upstairs by climbing only on his good ankle, then lifting the bad ankle with no weight on it at all, bringing that foot up to meet the good one so he was taking two steps for each stair he climbed.
Eventually reaching the top, he took a deep breath and walked to his room. It was large, as were all eight of the bedrooms in the house. He walked to his desk and dropped his backpack on it next to his computer, then moved to his dresser, pulling his polo shirt off as he did so and tossing it towards his bed. He pulled a pair of comfortable shorts and a tee shirt out of the drawers, then toed off his sneakers, unbuckled, dropped and stepped out of the creased khakis he was wearing.
Standing in only his briefs and socks, he was about to put on the shorts when he had a feeling he was being watched. He quickly turned. Mr. Thomas was standing in the doorway, staring at him. As Todd watched, he saw Mr. Thomas’ eyes drop to his underwear.
“What do you want?” Todd didn’t even try to keep the anger and contempt out of his voice.
“Just seeing if you need something, sir.” His voice was, as ever, obsequious, and set Todd’s teeth on edge. The leer in his eyes when they rose to meet Todd’s was just as disturbing.
“No, I don’t. You know I don’t like you up here when I’m home. Go away.”
“Just doing my job, sir. Just doing as your father wishes, keeping a close eye on you and your well–being.”
“Go away,” Todd repeated. There was tiredness in his voice now. It had truly been a lousy day.
“As you wish, sir. As you wish.” Mr. Thomas slowly dropped his eyes to Todd’s underpants again, waited till Todd turned around and started pulling on his shorts, then silently departed.