I finally found Parker and his grandparents near the ambulance, where his Grandma Thelma was being given oxygen. His Grandpa George seemed to be okay, but Parker was doing a lot of coughing. An Emergency Medical Technician came over and put him on oxygen as well. Then Parker and his grandma were loaded into the ambulance. His grandpa climbed in too.
As they left for the hospital, my parents and I went back to our house to get our car and follow them. Mom said I should stay home and go to school, but I was really upset and there was no way I was going to school, so she relented and off we went.
In the emergency room we found Grandpa George, who said that Parker and his grandma had both been taken back to the examining room. When we asked him what had happened, he said, “Fortunately, like most old men, I wake up in the night to use the bathroom. Last night, as soon as I awoke, I smelled smoke, so I got the other two up and Parker helped me carry Thelma outside. I had tied a damp handkerchief over my face, but Parker hadn’t, which is why he got more smoke than I did.
“Now I have no idea what we’re going to do. Everything we had was in that house and it looks like it’s a total loss. We have nowhere to go, no clothes ΜΆ nothing.”
My parents assured him that we would take care of him and his family. We had spare bedrooms and spare clothes and we were sure other neighbors would chip in as well.
After waiting for what felt like hours, a doctor came out and asked for George Johnston. Grandpa George talked with the doctor for a few minutes and returned to us, saying that Parker was being released but Grandma Thelma was going to be kept overnight just as a precaution. Grandpa George went in to talk with his wife for a few minutes and Parker came out to join us. He got hugs from all three of us. I held on for a long time, telling him how worried I had been, to which he gave me an extra hard squeeze before we parted.
When Grandpa George returned, we went to our car and drove home, where we all went in and had a late breakfast. After breakfast, Grandpa George walked over to his house, which was still being hosed down. He discovered that fortunately, his truck was undamaged except for a bit of singeing on the side nearest the house. Back then we trusted each other to the extent that we often left our keys in the cars. Grandpa George told us that he was going to return to the hospital to spend the rest of the day with Thelma. That left just Parker at our house.
Parker and I went upstairs where we got him temporarily situated in William’s room. In my room I pulled out some clothes for him. That would leave me a bit short of options for a while, but I had no problems with it.
When we finished all we could do, Parker and I sat on my bed and talked. I could see he was very upset, much more than he had previously let on. Now that everything had been settled for the minute and he could relax, he was suddenly overcome with sobbing. He laid his head on my shoulder as the tears came uncontrollably while I held him close. It was the first time I had ever held a boy like that, and to be honest I did have a few unworthy thoughts, but I quickly banished them from my mind.
Finally he said, “Thanks, Brian. I think I’ll go into the other bedroom and just rest for a bit.” After asking him if there was anything he needed and finding there wasn’t, I left him and went downstairs.
Dad had left for work, but Mom and I sat and talked. She noted that the left shoulder of my shirt was wet, so I told her about Parker leaning on it and crying.
“Poor boy,” she said, “he’s lost a family and two homes in just over a year. Of course he’s upset. He’ll need a lot of support from us in the next weeks.”
I agreed and then we talked about bedroom arrangements. My parents’ bedroom was on the first floor, and they had already agreed that Grandma and Grandpa Johnston should have that bedroom so the Jonstons wouldn’t have to deal with stairs. That meant that my parents would use my sister’s room temporarily. None of us knew future and not something to worry about right then.
Mom and I carried some of Dad’s and her clothing upstairs, which made some room for the Johnstons’ clothes when they got some.
Towards evening, Dad came home and then Grandpa George arrived. I woke Parker, who had slept soundly all afternoon, and we settled to a quiet supper of roast chicken and vegetables. Mom told Parker’s grandpa about the room arrangements. At first he didn’t want to take over my parents’ room, but, when she told him we had already moved things upstairs he agreed. Dad loaned him some clothes until he could get some.
The night was uneventful, although in the morning Parker said that through the night he kept waking up and smelling for smoke and he’d had trouble getting to sleep again.
Parker realized that all his schoolbooks and supplies had been destroyed in the fire, so, when we arrived at the school, we went into the office to find out what he should do. The assistant principal told him not to worry and assured him that he would be issued new books in his classes. He had no backpack, so I gave him some paper and a pencil and a pen to tide him over.
Of course, everyone in the school knew about the fire, and many expressed their happiness that Parker was okay. Kids in all his classes offered to supply him with anything he needed, and Patrick even said he had an extra backpack which he would bring over to my house after school.
At our lunch table, everyone was full of questions. Was Parker scared? How were his grandparents? Did Parker have to go to the hospital? Could anything from the house be salvaged? Where were he and his grandparents staying?
Between bites of his lunch, Parker answered them all.
When we arrived home in the afternoon, Grandma Thelma was there, looking no worse for the experience. She’d had a peaceful night in the hospital but was happy to be out of it. We all agreed to go to Hyannis on Saturday to buy them clothes. Grandpa George said he would go to the bank and get new checks and some cash.
Patrick was as good as his word, bringing a backpack to my house for Parker.
Friday night, before we went to bed, Parker and I sat on his bed talking. With tears in his eyes, he remarked on how kind everyone had been and how grateful he was.
“That’s one of the advantages of living in a small town,” I said. “Everyone looks out for everyone else.”
Before I left for my bedroom, I said, “Parker, there’s something I need to tell you.” He looked at me questioningly. “Since we’re gonna be in the same house for a while, I need to tell you that I lied to you before and I’m really embarrassed.”
“What did you lie about?”
“I told you I wasn’t queer, but I am. I’m sorry. I know you’re not and, if you don’t wanna be friends, I guess I’d understand, but I’d be pretty sad.”
Instead of being upset with me, he smiled his gorgeous smile and answered, “Of course I’m not upset and of course we can be friends. Why wouldn’t we be? After all, we’ve been friends for a while now and you haven’t changed at all. You’ve just trusted me with a secret, and I appreciate it. Who else knows?”
“Just my family and Todd, and now you.” I had never told him what Todd had said about him, and since I wasn’t sure I believed Todd, I wasn’t about to blurt it out. “I guess that someday the whole school will figure it out,” I went on, “and you probably won’t want to be associated with a queer.”
“Nonsense. We’re friends, and I hope we always will be. If some of the kids can’t handle that, it’s their problem, not ours. In fact, I think maybe you should consider telling them, so you won’t be trying to hide all the time.
I did know that telling my family had been a relief. Would the same be true of telling the kids at school yet would I be ostracized? I didn’t know, but I was sure I wasn’t prepared to find out.
We left it at that, and I went into my bedroom to get ready for bed. Lying there in the dark, I couldn’t help thinking, Damn, there’s a hot boy right next door to me and I can’t touch him. How long am I gonna be able to live with that?
I finally jerked off, picturing Parker naked of course, and was able to get to sleep.
Saturday, we all rode to Hyannis. It was a bit of a tight fit, but we managed. Of course, I didn’t mind being squeezed tight against Parker. I enjoyed helping him pick out clothes which I thought looked good on him. While we were in Hyannis, we had lunch at a seafood place. Grandpa Johnston insisted on paying, and after some initial resistance, my parents gave in. Parker and I had consolidated things in William’s bureau, so when we got back home there was room for Parker’s belongings too.
That year,1950, was a good one for middle-class white boys in small-town America. The war had been over for five years, and, while the Korean War was looming, we were too young to worry about it yet. In fact, we had to check in an atlas to learn where Korea was, just as many Americans had to do the same in 1941 to learn where Pearl Harbor was. Sure, for queer boys, the Lavender Scare was worrying, but in my town there was no mention of it and I tried to put my worry on the back burner. I’m sure most of us in America were totally unaware of the oppression of blacks, then called negroes. For us it was a time of prosperity after the war. Many of us knew we were destined for college before buying a home and raising a family. It was the American Dream coming true. Of course, I doubted I would be raising a family, but I kept that doubt to myself.
The Johnstons continued to live with us, which meant that Parker and I were sleeping next door to each other and probably both jerking off at about the same time. Occasionally in the night I caught sight of him in the hallway going to or returning from the bathroom. He was wearing boxer shorts, as I was, and I immediately sprung a boner which I desperately tried to hide until I realized that he had one too. How I ached to hold his hard cock.
A couple of weeks before Thanksgiving, Grandpa George announced that he had found a small ranch house for rent in a nearby town and that they would move before the holidays. He was concerned about Parker, who would have to change schools once again. My Mom suggested that Parker stay with us at least during the week and perhaps go to his new home on the weekends. Everyone, including Parker, agreed.
We all helped the Johnstons move. Of course, they had very little furniture, but some families loaned or gave them beds, two dressers, a table and chairs for the kitchen, and a couple of chairs for their living room. In time they scoured thrift shops and the Salvation Army shop in Hyannis and were able to furnish their house. The furniture wasn’t beautiful, but it served the purpose while they were getting on their feet.
Again at Thanksgiving time, my two brothers came home but my sister did not. Since Parker was with his grandparents there was no problem with rooms. We invited Parker and his grandparents for Thanksgiving dinner, which made it a crowded but happy celebration because the Johnstons had managed to land on their feet. Of course, my brothers wanted to hear all about the fire, so the tale was told again. They were amazed that everyone had gotten out safely.
“Yes,” said Grandpa George. “We old men often have to get up in the night to use the bathroom. If I’d been a younger man, we would probably all have died.” While we all joined in the laughter, I couldn’t get a picture out of my mind of Parker, lying on his bed, dead. It was a picture that haunted me from time to time for years.
After dinner most of the folks wanted to rest, but Parker and I went for a walk. As we walked I gave Parker a playful little shove trying to knock him off balance. He gently retaliated. We made our way, giggling and occasionally shoving, until we got to the elementary school playground, where we headed for the swings. Sitting there, all alone, the two of us were silent for a while.
Finally, Parker said, “Brian, I lied to you just like you lied to me, but it was because I wasn’t sure. I told you I wasn’t queer, and I really, really didn’t want to be. That’s why I went on those dates, because I wanted to see what would happen. Well, nothing happened. Oh, we had a good time, but I found I wasn’t really interested in any of the girls. I even tried kissing one and nothing happened. In the meantime, I’ve been desperately wanting to kiss you, so I guess I’m probably queer.”
I reached over to him, pulling our swings together, and kissed his neck. In a moment he turned and kissed me on the lips. I felt my cock suddenly going very hard and trying to burst out of my blue jeans. It was my first boy kiss and I’m sure it was his
too.
When we broke the kiss at last, I asked, “You said kissing the girl did nothing for you. What about kissing me?”
“Oh, God, that gave me such a boner!”
I told him about the new term, “gay,” and we agreed to use it with each other. We sat silently until our erections subsided, and then started for home. As we walked, Parker said, “This is all so new to me. Can we just move very slowly and see what happens?”
“Sure,” I agreed. “In fact, I’m not even sure how two guys have sex together. I guess they can jerk each other off, but can they do more?”
It took us a while to figure things out, but it was all an exciting adventure and we were eager to start.